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My Join-Up® Experience

re-doing join-up's

Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed 200 lessons completed 250 lessons completed 300 lessons completed

I was just outside with MY STAR and did some more join-ups.
I am exhausted. She is fine and probably wondering who is this old lady, anyway.
I did as suggested and I didn't realize how tired it would make me.
I kept my body square and moved with her, eyes on eyes.
Boy did I get dizzy, two or three times I had to stop to get my balance, I wish I could use my cane for support.
I then took her for a walk at a brisk pace and that just about did me in. She kept up and walked over the poles like they were nothing.
It will be great when I video my husband walking her, he too has long legs.
I sure hope I don't have to do that again soon. Perhaps I'll ask my husband to do this with her.
Funny I don't get tired riding, of course I haven't been well lately, perhaps that's what's going on.
Don't laugh too hard, OK.
Ronda

Dennis
Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed

Ronda
Who's laughing You are giving it your all so that My Star has a good join up and you get all that physical therapy that only working with a horse can provide. No matter how much discomfort I feel, I always feel better after being with my horse, but sometimes it takes a day or so to really feel the difference.

Cheers

Miriam (Holland&Germany)
Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed 200 lessons completed 250 lessons completed 300 lessons completed 350 lessons completed 400 lessons completed 450 lessons completed 500 lessons completed 550 lessons completed 600 lessons completed 650 lessons completed

Hi Ronda,
Please help me with the term Join-ups in plural!
How many times did you Join-up with Star at all?
There is no need to Join-up more then 5 or 6 times with a horse, but maybe you could ask your husband to Join-up with her.
Why don't you introduce your cane and desensitze her to it, and then have it as your walking aid, when you work with her?
Don't get yourself into distress, she sees you as her leadingmare, who wants more!
The rest is working on her education and as Dennis says so right your own physical healing.
You're doing a good job,
Miriam

star
Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed 200 lessons completed 250 lessons completed 300 lessons completed

Hi, thank you for your encouragement.
Before I do ANY work with STAR I do A join-up.
Please remember she is a remedial horse and still very young, emotionally.
I mostly do this to keep our connection and for a good work out for her and I.
As I've said before I run her to build muscle, she is young and my plans for her will require lots of muscle.
She also has the habit of running most of the time, she loves it and it is in her blood, therefore the need for her to learn to slow down when I request it.
As Monty says, an amature pratices until he gets it right, a proffessional practises until he cannot get it wrong.
And when I have a really good join-up with her, everything that follows will be so much easier for her and I.
I want to practise my signals with her, it's a lot to remember and put into action.
We do other work together, as well.
As for myself, I have a complete gym in my house and as a former RMT I have an unbelievabel program.
My use of the cane is for balance, when I turn to the left, because of my head injury, I loose my balance, with or without a cane.
If I were to use my cane while in the round pen, it would be cumbersome and probably get tangled in the rope. Star is used to it, it does not frighten her at all.
That part of my balance will never come back, it has been 8 years now and I'm at my personal peak as far as fittness is concerned, since the accident.
The reason for my exhaustion is I have the flu right now and I'm from the old school, suck-it-up, it could be worse.
STAR needs her attention everyday, when the weather cooperates I use it to the full, I don't have my beautiful indoor arena, soon!
My post was to encourage others even when we get it wrong or are feeling tired, the fresh air will do us both good and give us satifaction that we tried.
Thanks so much for your concerns, please remember I don't always express myself very well.
I'm sorry for posting and not expressing myself correctly.
Ronda

Rudi - Pratteln, Switzerland
Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed 200 lessons completed 250 lessons completed 300 lessons completed 350 lessons completed 400 lessons completed 450 lessons completed 500 lessons completed 550 lessons completed 600 lessons completed

Maybe there is a problem of definition of Join-Up. The classical one: Sending away - Join-Up, as a first contact to the horse. The general one: Join-Up makes part of the reaction to the Equus language, taking the horse from the pasture, working on the long lines, working freely. The general one has an open end. It does not make sense to repeat the first one too many times, once the communication to the horse is established.

star
Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed 200 lessons completed 250 lessons completed 300 lessons completed

Rudi, I agree with you there.
Something I have to keep in mind is my horses's situation, she is remedial, she is young and Monty says with some horses you have to do , the beginning join-up several times.
Sometimes before every learning session.
As I have said over and over, she understands what to do she just needs to learn to slow down and listen.
I will not quote again about pratice.
To run STAR safely and every day I only have her round pen, she naturally views this as her learning center, in whatever I do with her.
I realize it only has to be done perhaps 6 times and they get it.
I acknowledge their is nothing wrong with her join-ups, it's me. And I will keep practising, until I get it right.
Ronda

karinwatson
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hi everyone, my name is karin, i am new and am looking forward to being intouch with everyone, but mostly learning that certain situations are not "just me" and that i am not the only person with a difficult pony.
on that subject, i have a delightfull pony called sky,she is a welsh section B, grey, 12.2 and she has one brown eye and one wall eye, although i have owned her for 8 years{she is 16}and i have seen her almost every day i have not done that much work with her as my daughter did all the work as i was too nervous,i used to watch my daughter and wished i could have the confidence to work with her.
My daughter went from a teenager to a young woman and got her own horse whom she needed to work with, this was my moment, my daughter said "mum you need to learn with her" o.k said i, that was about 10months or so ago, i have never looked back,i am just soo excited about the future, however, she is a moody mare and i am still a nervous mare
so we clash, she gives me signs that say "go away get out of my pad" and i go "o k then and leave" not a good idea, any advise forever welcome .

karin

Kicki -- Sweden
Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed 200 lessons completed 250 lessons completed 300 lessons completed 350 lessons completed 400 lessons completed 450 lessons completed 500 lessons completed 550 lessons completed 600 lessons completed

Hi Karin!
Good for you, taking on your fears like this. :)
.
Mares are known for being moody. Sort of comes with being a girl, if you know what I mean. ;) (Just in general, of course! Far from all of them are!)
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My guess is that your Sky is also taking advantage of the fact that she can dominate you and make you move out of her personal space. Every time she does, she has won that particular battle and gets stronger in her position.
That said, as long as you are feeling nervous, you are doing the right thing in not engaging in something you might not be able to get out of without a real fight. Staying safe is paramount!
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My advice is that you need to renegotiate who's the boss.
I would also advise you to try to stay as relaxed as you can around Sky and remember to breathe slowly and steadily - but I know first hand how terribly difficult this can be when the confidence in the situation isn't there.
So you need to build up that first!
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Have you ever done a proper Join-up?
Is there someone in your area who can help you with this?
I do recommend getting "professional" help at this stage, not because I don't think you can achieve it on your own, but to give you enough confidence to do it, to let you know if you're doing it right or wrong, before you start second guessing yourself and Sky, and also to help you out afterwards so you have someone to discuss your progress and problems with.
Once you learn how to control her, the more confident in yourself, you will be. The more you see of Sky's "obedient" side, the more relaxed you will be, and the more relaxed you are the easier it will be to communicate with her.
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Best of luck!!!

Lizzie
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Hi Karin - being a true novice (I've only recently become an owner of rescue ponies) I can really relate to what you write about being nervous - especially when your pony makes it clear she wants you to 'go away'!

I'm sure you will get lots of brilliant advice from others on the forum who have had horses for years. What Kicki has written for example, makes perfect sense. One thing I would say is that I just last weekend got someone in to help train me on groundwork and it was the best £X I have spent in ages! If you're nervous and experiencing a pony who is showing you she thinks she is leader that can really dent your confidence - well it did me. The combination of tuition and using a dually have been a true revelation to me. I know I'm only a novice but I'd strongly urge you to consider getting someone in to give you some tips - having someone next to you while you're doing groundwork may give you that little bit of extra reassurance.

Let us know how you get on?
Best wishes, Lizzie

karinwatson
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hi lizzie and kicki

Thank you both so much for your replies,according to my daughter and a couple of horsey friends i am nowhere near as frightened and nervous as i convince myself i am,i can get her out her pad, groom, do feet and tack her up.she is on a grazing bucket and limited grass as she is slightly over weight and at risk of lammy, every day i put a headcollar on take the bucket off for a while then reverse this procedure to get the bucket back on, {this is a tad harder as madam is not having bucket back on}but, with patience,and a soft voice i win the battle.

however,if she decides she is not having her feet done thats where i give in she is also a dab hand at swinging her butt round and, carrying the job through,so again i end up backing off.

My daughter knows of a lady who works with natural horsemanship,katie {my daughter}has highly recomended that i have some lessons with her and reading both of your comments today i am now convinced it is the best thing for me to do, so in due course i will let you know.

Kicki -- Sweden
Hello! 100 lessons completed 150 lessons completed 200 lessons completed 250 lessons completed 300 lessons completed 350 lessons completed 400 lessons completed 450 lessons completed 500 lessons completed 550 lessons completed 600 lessons completed

That sounds great, Karin! :)
My fingers will be crossed for your progress, and do keep us updated!